Never has there been a push to create, plan, or move like the one stirring my heart and soul as we enter this odd numbered year. I assign part of it to the monumental 365 days we’ve just passed. To look back and see the incredible people I’ve met, the missions I’ve seen moved, and the love shown to me by family and friends, it’s going to take a huge agenda to even meet that of 2018. But, I’m wondering, is “can you top this” the game I should be playing with my current days?
I had one of those under the microscope moments last night that has me thinking otherwise. Rachel Hollis, stand out author and generally awesome citizen was asking the tough questions last night. Do I really need to be the five things I identify myself to be OR could I spend just one hour a day, five days a week on one thing I know is my fulfillment? I’ve imagined this answer since March 12th 1987. I know, some reading this are trying to do the math. It was 31 years ago. I sat at a typewriter (yes, a typewriter) with a lined 3×5 card ready to define my future. I put down these 15 items. They’ve been my way finder for three decades. I’ve strayed from them many (many) times. I’ve recited them over 10,000 times.
This is the first time I’ve made them public:
My Life Objectives 3/12/1987
- Live for happiness
- Enjoy family togetherness
- Be honest
- Be resourceful
- Thank God for being alive, every day
- Be money wise
- Be educated
- Make people laugh
- Be the best speaker, I know I am
- Be the best writer, I know I am
- Be a land developer
- Be a terrific student
- Be a good sales person
- Be disciplined to my mental health
- Be disciplined to my physical health
- Fullfil these life objectives
This list was not just a set of ideas. It came out of several sessions with a psychologist I met with over an 18 month period trying to assess the damage I’d done in my past. Those setbacks included a failed one-year marriage, an expensive business bankruptcy, and personal financial ruin in part to a decade long addiction. My mission was to accept the past and chart a course using the limited recourses I had.
To borrow a sports term, It was a “rebuilding year” for every part of me. Faithfully, I attended Toastmasters meetings every Tuesday night and wrote for the community newspaper while maintain a fulltime sales position in home furnishings, the business I grew up in. I was persuaded to get involved in the community as a volunteer for the American Cancer Society. This led to fundraising events and many new friendships. Eventually, ACS asked me to lead a team of staff and volunteers as an employee.
As I pondered this opportunity to spend my professional time saving lives, this was to be the first of many times over the past three decades examining my life objectives against a possibility in front of me. Within the first month, it became crystal clear that full time fundraising for cancer research and patient services (although a worthy calling) was not congruent with the mission on my 3×5 card.
Returning to my previous position in Bellevue wasn’t an option but taking a Tacoma showroom role was and it turned out to be the miracle needed to put 100% focus on my 3×5 card. 25 Years later, much has elevated my life to it’s current grateful state. A partner of 15 years in Jill, a beautiful 13 year old daughter in Daniela, and a million memories from two decades in fundraising/philanthropy. But, there is only one big problem. In 2019, I’m standing at the same intersection again. This time, there is a whole lot less time to pivot and ride another wave to the place I’ve imagined and dreamed of since March 12th 1987. Be the best speaker I know I am is a giant neon sign flashing in my brain. It’s been there the whole time, all 31 years. The stage is set. I’ve already stood on it many times, in a different role.
I’ve even written/released the book: Which One am I? 12 Extraordinary People, like You!
Perhaps I’ve now realized the fingers used to write that book encouraging others to share what makes them extraordinary are all pointing back at me. I believe those same fingers are forming a hand I feel pushing me to live the life I’ve imagined.
Rachel Hollis: I will be forever grateful for this moment. Your words have reached me in a place I’ve needed to revisit for a very long time. “Nobody gets to tell you how big your dreams are” is about a clear a directive as I needed. Hello 2019, meet 1987.